Inevitable Disillusion
by The Carpet Shampoo
Summary: Sora...I can't see... Don't worry...I'll guide you... Two friends, reunited after being torn apart, struggle to rekindle the love they had before. Riku x Sora, Cowritten by The Ambitious Blank.
1. Chapter 1

Inevitable Disillusion

Co-written by The Carpet Shampoo and The Ambitious Blank

Disclaimer- Kingdom Hearts isn't ours, it shall never be ours, and if it was.. well.. umm.. we won't go there. ^_~

Comments- Finally, a co-write by us! :D Hurray!

The Ambitious Blank here! Just for your information, "The Carpet Shampoo", the one who is hosting this fic, is formerly known as "PixieWhitefeather". ^_^ And of course, you all know me, right? Right?? x.x Um, so anyway. The Carpet Shampoo expressed the desire to write angst with a plot.. she had a beautiful idea for a story, and so I, The Ambitious Blank, commented on how we had been planning to co-write something for a while.. and since my specialty is angst, we decided to co-write a Kingdom Hearts.

Plot is slight AU-ish. It takes place at the end of what we would assume is KH2, where Sora is just finishing up his search for Riku, and has searched throughout the worlds. He can still move between the worlds, but they're starting to drift too far apart, so he can't look much longer. He's been searching for 2 years, has found King Mickey, but no sign of Riku. And now.. he's reached Hollow Bastion, the last place to search before he's forced to return home...

~*~

_"When we get back to our island, do you think things will ever be the same between us?" _

Sora pushed open the ornate wooden doors leading into the hallway of Hollow Bastion. 

"Leon?" He called out, hesitantly, putting one foot inside the door, the silence from inside making him nervous. A door to his left opened, and Leon poked his head out, in an almost comical manner, had Leon been the type to really be funny.

"O-oh.. Sora. It's just you.. I thought you were Rin-- er, nevermind." Leon pulled his head back inside, leaving Sora quite puzzled. Leon never stuttered, did he? Ah, well. The man emerged a few seconds later, smoothing down his hair and pulling on his jacket. If Sora didn't know any better, he'd say Leon was downright nervous, or perhaps hiding something. 

"Ahem.. so, any news?" The man asked casually, his hand reaching up in its trademark way to smooth down his hair. Sora gave a snort of mock indignation.

"What, no 'Hello, Sora!'? No 'How are you?'? No 'I love you and miss you!'?"

The door opened again, knocking into Leon, and this time, Cloud poked his head out, his eyes narrowed as if he'd heard something that had upset him in some way. The arm that had snaked around the door when Cloud opened it was quite clearly bare and as Cloud leaned out more, Sora could see that he was not wearing a shirt either. He looked odd, to Sora's point of view. Slightly angry, a little flustered. He looked down and saw Sora there and his shoulders relaxed. It was obvious to anyone he was in a state of half-undress, and he looked mildly surprised at seeing Sora there.

"What..?" He asked, staring directly at Sora, who could only blink in cute confusion, his expression oddly innocent. Leon's eyes widened faintly at the sight of the blond behind him, and he turned around, shoving the blonde back into the room, growling through gritted teeth. He gave Cloud one of his famous death glares as he pushed him back out of Sora's view. 

"Cloud, go and take your _shower…"_ He muttered, closing the door.

"Make sure to scrub behind your ears!" Sora called, grinning as he waved after him. Leon turned his gaze on the boy, shifting his weight slightly to lean against the door, his leather-gloved hand running through his brown hair, smoothing it down some more.

"Again, any news of your friend? Riku, was it...?" He asked. Sora shook his head, his hair swinging back against his face. His face remained as cheerful as ever, that famous Sora smile that had even made Leon's ice heart melt a little was plastered unwaveringly to his face. But something deeper, an emotion lost, was visible behind blue eyes. Inside, it hurt that he hadn't found Riku yet, more than it hurt when he couldn't find Kairi. 

"Nothing. And we searched everywhere." He answered, dejectedly. Leon frowned a little.

"What about King Mickey?" He questioned. Sora sighed.

"We found him. But…he didn't know where Riku was. He said… he said Riku must have stayed back for some reason. I really don't know what's going on. It seems like I've searched every single world there is! There's no sign of him anywhere. I'm running out of places to look." The boy said, his shoulders slumping a little. Leon sighed, hesitating for a moment, as if there was something he didn't particularly want to say. Sora blinked. He could tell that something was bothering the older man.

"Huh? What's wrong?" Sora asked hesitantly. He wasn't really sure if he wanted to know.

"...You're not only running out of places to look, you're running out of time." Leon said, slowly. Sora blinked again. That made no sense. 

"W-What do you mean?"

"I mean... the worlds are drifting too far apart for you to search anymore. You've been fine traveling thus far, because you've traveled from closest world to the next closest world. But the world's are drifting apart still Sora…" The man said, keeping his gaze away from Sora's. He couldn't bear to see the look on Sora's face "...The closest world to here is probably yours, Sora. But even it is drifting away Sora. But my guess is you only have about two hours before it'll be too far away for you to travel to. If you don't leave soon, you'll be stranded here."

"Wh-what?!" Sora didn't want to believe it. His search was over, and he hadn't even found a single clue yet. It just wasn't fair! But what was he supposed to do? It wasn't like he had the ability to push the worlds back together. The wielder of the Keyblade was capable of a lot of things.. but manipulating the worlds wasn't anywhere on the list. Sora could only stare, open-mouthed, at Leon.

"You have to be kidding me. Please say you're just kidding." He begged. "Or that you have some news of Riku."

Leon shook his head, his eyes still downcast.

"I'm sorry. I don't have anything." He said, holding out his hands in front of him. Sora sighed.

Leon wasn't one to be funny, after all.

"We'll help you get ready to go." The gunbladist said, nodding to him. Sora's shoulders slumped even lower. He didn't want to be stuck here, in Hollow Bastion.. he needed to go back to the island. Go back to his parents. Go back to Kairi. After all, a promise was a promise, right? 

Sora leaned back against a pillar, putting a hand to his forehead. He fought the few tears that threatened him. His head behind to throb dully, though Sora tried to shake off the pain. This was all just too much. He couldn't stop looking for Riku... but what choice did he have now that the worlds were almost completely separated again? What could he do to change something like that? 

Nothing. Nothing at all.

He felt a hand on his shoulder, and Leon stood there, his eyes showing an extremely vague worry.

"Hey. Don't worry too much about it... you're starting to look like me." He said, the very beginnings of a smile quirking at the corner of his lips. Sora managed a weak grin. He must look really pathetic if Leon attempted to make a joke to cheer him up.

"Heh.. right."

~*~

"This friend of yours.. Riku. He can think for himself, I'm sure... so maybe he's just waiting for you on your island or something." Leon said as they headed towards Sora's gummi ship. Leon knew this was a highly improbably situation, but he couldn't help it…Sora looked so down, Leon would say anything to cheer him up at this point. Cloud, Yuffie, Cid, and Aerith had tagged along behind. Well, Yuffie, Cid, and Aerith had tagged along, while Cloud seemed to be purposefully keeping his distance from Leon, though he was heading in the general direction they were.

"I dunno.. I really don't know how he could have gotten out of Kingdom Hearts." Sora said, frowning. The idea that Riku was already waiting for him toyed with him, trying to get his hopes up. But Sora knew within himself, somewhere, that Riku wouldn't be coming back. He'd searched almost every world as thoroughly as he could, and there had been absolutely no trace of anything. His heart ached within his chest, a feeling of failure beginning to enter him. But, there was still Kairi, always waiting for him, he knew that much.

Kairi.

His heart lifted a significant bit. Maybe because Kairi was there, things could go almost back to normal. Even without Riku there. Maybe there was still some hope left for happiness. Selphie, Wakka, and Tidus would be there, goofing off as usual. The beach would still be the same. The Paopu tree, in all it's desolate crookedness, would still be hanging over the water. It wouldn't have Riku, but things would be all right. Sora would never have to fight the Heartless and he and Kairi could run around and have adventures, just like before. Like none of this ever happened.

Yeah, maybe things could be the same after all!

Sora turned as the Gummi Ship's doors closed, grinning back at Leon.

"Hey, don't worry. If I see Rinoa on my way back, I'll make sure to distract her so you and Cloud can have some 'alone time'." He said, giving the now completely dumbfounded man a thumbs up. Even Cloud jerked in surprise, staring at Sora with wide, ice-blue eyes. Sora smirked as the doors closed on him and the ship flew away.

Cloud came up to stand beside Leon, slipping an arm around the other's waist. Leon sighed, shaking his head.

"..I hate kids." He muttered.

~*~

Sora kicked off his shoes and his bare feet sink into the familiar sand on the beach. He stretched, inhaling the fresh, salty air. It felt good to be home again, even without the company he would have liked to have had with him.

Riku..

"SORAAAA!!" The cry scared away a few seagulls that had been pecking around near him, as a flash of red hair was all Sora saw before he was knocked to the ground, a familiar face smiling down upon him.

"Gah.. gimme a break, Kairi.." Sora complained, struggling to sit up as she clung to him.

"Sora, oh my god.. it's so good to have you back!" She said excitedly, practically exploding with joy. Sora smiled.

"Good to be back." He said, grinning. "But.. I.." He hesitated, thinking about Riku. How was he supposed to break the news to the poor girl? Riku had meant so much to both of them. To tell her that Riku was nowhere to be found was hard.. almost too hard.

"..what? What's wrong, Sora..?" Kairi immediately grew concerned, peering closely at his face. Sora turned away. He couldn't bear to tell her this so soon after getting back. He could feel a familiar pricking at his eyes. With Riku not here, things couldn't be the same. Things would always be different, now. Sora's hopes crashed to the floor, shattering like glass.

"It.. it's Riku, I couldn't find.. I couldn't find him, Kairi.. I'm so sorry.." Sora choked out, feeling a warm tear escaping involuntarily from his eye, dripping into the sand. Kairi opened her mouth to say something, but a painfully familiar voice from the shadows interrupted her.

"..jeez, Sora.. stop being such a crybaby."

Reviews are appreciated, as always. ^_~

~*~To Be Continued..


	2. Chapter 2

ï»¿   
**"Inevitable Disillusion"**  
**By The Ambitious Blank and The Carpet Shampoo**  
  
**Disclaimer-** Uh, no, neither of us own Kingdom Hearts. We wish we did, though. ^_^  
**Author's Commentary:** Well, we did get some positive feedback, so I suppose we'll keep this going. ^^ This is Shampoo here, I'll be the main writer of this chapter (Blank mostly wrote the last one)   
  
Blank here! XP Just popping in to say hi as I make my few edits.. and as you can see, this chapter is indeed much more in Shampoo's style, I'm leaving most of it as is..  
  
  
~*~**Chapter 2**   
  
One year ago...  
  
_ Kairi sighed, staring out at the ocean. It was a deep and tranquil blue today, shimmering and almost glowing beneath the bright island sun. It was such a brilliant blue, so rare for the ocean to be that color, but still... a color that seemed so familiar to her. Kairi paused, pondering this moment in time, wondering where she had seen such a shade of blue. Her cerulean eyes closed, lashes against her skin, eerily pale even in the summer time. Her tiny hands, delicate even for a girl's, clasped together against the white cotton of her shirt covering her heart.  
  
Of course! How could she forget? That brilliant blue of the ocean was the same color Sora's eyes were when he smiled at her. How long had it been since she had last seen Sora now? Kairi tried to think back, her tiny little nose scrunched up as she thought. It had to have been at least a year.   
  
She had been so deep in thought that she hadn't even noticed the figure in the water as it drifted closer and closer. Suddenly a flash of silver reflected from the sun's bright light, catching Kairi's eye.__   
  
"What the...?" She daintily slipped off her shoes and jumped out in the water. She was no Sora or Riku, but she was an island girl and she knew how to swim. Kairi doggie-paddled her way out to the figure in the water, purposely swimming this way as to not lost sight of the figure. It seemed to be a giant, black trash bag, but upon closer inspection, Kairi realized the figure was a boy in a long, ebony cape.   
  
"He's blindfolded..." Kairi remarked to herself, realizing why the figure had seemed so inhuman. She reached out towards the figure, her gentle hands clumsily knocking back the hood that covered his face. A waterfall of silver hair tumbled out from its hiding place, clinging damply to the pale, ethereal skin.   
  
"Riku!" Kairi gasped, recognizing the face in an instant, even despite the blindfold. She looked around, half-expecting to see Sora, when Riku began squirming in her grasp. He seemed uncomfortable in some way, squirming this way and that, as if trying to avoid something.   
  
Kairi figured it was probably the salt water and began swimming towards shore. It was hard carrying Riku with her, and he was so squirmy, making the task even harder. To make things even worse, the water made her grip slippery, and she had to work hard to keep her hold on him.   
  
"Riku!" Kairi called out as he slipped from her grip. She reached down and quickly grabbed his hood, pulling him back up again. The hood slipped over his face once more as Kairi regained her grip. She reached to pull it back from his face but then realized something.   
  
Riku was perfectly still again. He was breathing, albeit a little hard, but he was still as long as that hood completely covered his face.   
  
"Is it the light that's bothering him...?" Kairi wondered, but only briefly, for at that moment her feet collided with soft, squishy sand. She sighed with relief as she felt the sand between her toes and she could walk into shore, dragging the practically dead weight behind her, the tide helping to push the silver-haired boy up onto the beach. She looked around once more, still hopeful to see that familiar cheery smile and ocean-blue eyes, but there was nothing but the wide open sea...  
  
~*~  
  
"Come on Riku...Just eat...? Please?" Kairi held the spoon full of soup up the platinum-haired boy's mouth, pleading with him. It had been two days since the boy had arrived and regained consciousness. Kairi could barely see him as he shook his head and turned back to staring at the window.   
  
Kairi sighed. All Riku ever did was stare at the window, as if he could see out it. For one, Kairi had put blackout curtains up and kept the light off all the time. For two, Riku had still not removed his blindfold. Nor had he eaten, or even spoken. Did he even recognize her? Did he remember her at all?   
  
"Riku...Please eat? For me? For...Sora?" Instantly, Riku turned and seemed to stare directly at her. His eyes were hidden, but Kairi could still feel the intensity of his gaze on her, even through the thick fabric of the blindfold.   
  
"Sora...So, you remember Sora? Sora's out looking for you...You need to get better, Riku. You need to eat and sleep, so when Sora finally returns, you can be healthy for him." She said pointedly. Kairi held up the spoon of soup again. During the entire speech, she had felt Riku's gaze on her. It was so strange, how haunting it was, even if she couldn't see those familiar aqua eyes. Obediently, he opened his mouth and allowed Kairi to feed him. He didn't eat more than half the bowl, but it was a start.   
  
~*~  
  
"'Sora'! 'Sora'! Is that all you can write? I said to write down want you want and need in here, Riku! You can't talk, but I know you can hear me! I can't read your mind, Riku! Tell me what it is you need!" Kairi felt the sting of tears in her eyes as she stared helplessly at the notepad. Riku was eating better now, but he had yet to speak a word. Selphie had come up with the idea of giving him a notepad, instead of Kairi always guessing what he wanted.   
  
But upon receiving the notepad, Riku had only scribbled one note down â€" "Sora". It was plain and simple. Page after page, Riku never requested food or drink, or anything. Just "Sora".   
  
"Riku...I don't understand. Why do you keep writing 'Sora'? Sora isn't here, Riku. Only I am. What is it you need?" Riku reached out and calmly took the notepad from Kairi. He bent over it closely, almost as if he could actually see the paper in front of him. Kairi felt her spirits rise as Riku appeared to be taking longer on this message. He finally handed it back to her. Kairi squinted in the little bit of light they had before she finally realized what it was.   
  
It was a picture. Riku had drawn a picture of Sora. Kairi felt her anger bubble up inside of her as she stared at the picture.   
  
"You ass!" She screamed, then threw the notebook back at him and stormed out. Riku picked up the notepad and seemed to stare at the picture. A small smirk crossed his features as he then looked off in the direction Kairi had gone.   
  
Some things never change...  
  
_~*~  
  
Kairi turned at the sound of Riku's voice. Sora had long dropped his grip on her and was running towards his friend.   
  
"Sora...wait..." Kairi felt the sudden urge to warn Sora of Riku's sudden changes, but her voice fell on deaf ears. Nothing could stop Sora from being reunited with his old friend.   
  
Kairi froze as she thought of something. Riku had just talked. To Sora. And sounded exactly like his old self. She felt that small bubble of frustration take over again. She had just spent an entire year babying Riku, giving up her social life to care for him, even letting him sleep in her bed. She had helped him stand out of bed, hand fed him herself, and desperately tried to get answers out of him. Yet, there he was. Talking to Sora. Standing and walking on his own. Kairi turned to march over to them and give Riku a piece of her mind when she suddenly saw Riku take Sora in a tight hug. She stopped in her tracks, and smiled... it really did please her to see them both look so happy with each other. She turned, starting to walk away.   
  
Maybe she could give Riku that piece of her mind tomorrow instead.  
  
~*~   
  
"Riku!" Sora called out, his feet pounding against the sand, kicking up soft clouds behind him. After all his searching, all his hard work, Riku had been here all along. Sora ran up to Riku and was about to leap at his friend in a flying hug when suddenly he stopped dead, right in front of the other. Would Riku even _let_ Sora hug him now? So much had changed and happened between them...   
  
His heart pounded strangely in his chest as he stood before the cloaked boy, staring up at the blindfolded face. His gaze was met by Riku's "own", the silver-haired boy's face turned directly towards him. Sora remained where he was, hesitating and unsure. Something within him told him that Riku, despite the change in appearance and lack of sight, knew what he was thinking... even what he was _feeling_.   
  
Riku's hand suddenly shot out, grabbing Sora's shoulders and pulling him into a tight embrace.   
  
~*~**To Be Continued...**   
****   
Reviews= good. XP Naw. Just hoped you liked it. ^^ Blank and Shampoo, out! (For now.) 


	3. Chapter 3

Inevitable Disillusion

By The Ambitious Blank

Disclaimer- Kingdom Hearts isn't ours, if that wasn't obvious already. I mean, look at it. Where's the slash? :B

Comments- Right! Blank here, writing the third chappie of the story. ^^; Er, well, most of it, anywho. Fwee.

~*~Chapter 3

"It's okay, you know." Riku whispered softly to Sora, still holding him tightly. Sora sighed quietly, his tense muscles relaxing somewhat. Riku held onto him for a few seconds longer before he released him, a small smile on his face. Sora stared at his friend, studying the facee he thought he'd known. Riku's hair had grown a little longer, going a few inches past his shoulders now. It was so strange, staring up into that face and not seeing those sharp aqua eyes staring back at him.

Riku tilted his head curiously. His hand moved up, hovered near the side of Sora's face, hesitating, before it placed itself directly on Sora's cheek. The younger boy blinked, jerking in mild surprise. Riku's face was turned directly toward him, as if he could see. Sora lowered his eyes, his head resting on Riku's chest. The silver-haired boy clutched him tighter.

"So, you were here the entire time." Sora murmured thoughtfully, his head still pressed to Riku's chest. Riku pulled back a little, his head turning down to "look" at Sora again. His piercing gaze seemed to break through even the thick fabric of the blindfold. Sora reached up, touching the tie that held it there, when Riku suddenly yanked back and smacked his hand away with such force that Sora jerked in pain.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"Don't touch that." Riku said, his voice holding the commanding tone of "listen to me or die", a tone that Riku only used when he was absolutely dead serious about something. So Sora dropped his hand, frowning.

"You've changed, Riku."

"And you're telling me you haven't?" The older boy asked. Sora frowned and stuck his lower lip out in one of those old, trademarked pouts of his. Riku gave a small snicker, poking his nose.

"Y'know, a pout generally doesn't work on people who can't see." He said, teasingly. Sora blinked in surprise.

"How did you..?" He trailed off, utterly confused. Riku gave a small chuckle.

"Come on, you practically radiate 'I'm pouting, pay attention to me!'." He said, grinning. Sora sighed, shaking his head.

"Yeah, yeah." He said, not being able to hold back a small smile himself. His heart was lifting. Riku was teasing him, as though things hadn't changed between them. Sora stared upward, at the same blue sky that he and Riku used to watch together, back in the days when they were young, and felt invincible. Back before the days of Keyblades and Heartless, before the fate of the world had been thrown on their shoulders.

We were so happy, then.. even despite our problem with keeping it a secret from Kairi.. we never wanted to disappoint her, did we? Sora thought, that calm smile still on his face. I thought things would always be the same..

_~*~_

_Sora didn't remember when he first felt the change inside of him. It was as if one day he just woke up to discover he was in love, even though he knew it wasn't true. Over time, his best friend had evolved into something more in his trusting eyes, something he hadn't even considered before._

_Sora knew he was naïve, and so at first he had doubted his own feelings. Riku never held him, never kissed him, the way Sora sometimes saw the older boys and girls kissing. So why should Sora love him? He had never seen two boys or two girls kissing before, and he wondered if it was somehow wrong. _

_Sora often read about love, or watched movies with people in love. They always talked about how people's hearts pounded when they were around that person, or how they always thought about that person, or how they shared tender soft kisses. _

_Sora's heart had never pounded around Riku before, he never even felt desire to kiss him. He just…loved him. All he wanted was for Riku to be happy, and to be with Riku forever. He never felt nervous or shy, or blushed around Riku. He felt…safe. Like Riku would never hurt him. He trusted Riku with all his heart and he wasn't afraid of getting hurt._

_"Riku…" Sora had approached him that night, something on his mind that had been there often in recent times._

_"Riku, can one boy kiss another boy?" Riku was the oldest boy that Sora knew, and therefore in Sora's mind, the smartest as well. Riku turned towards Sora and smiled and took a step towards him._

_"Sora, you goof…" he mumbled softly before closing the distance between them and giving Sora his first kiss. Sora was shocked to feel Riku's lips against his, softly caressing his. Sora realized for the first time, he had absolutely no idea what to do. He tried to move his lips the way Riku was, but he felt awkward and stupid doing so. Riku pulled away, laughing and ruffled Sora's hair.'_

_"You're an awful kisser Sora!" The brunet blushed and covered his face. He was used to Riku's teasing, but this was just mean.  Riku smiled apologetically, and patted Sora on the head._

_"Don't worry…we'll practice some more later on, and you'll get better. I promise."_

_And Sora knew that even though his heart didn't flutter, it was love._

_~*~ _

_Riku whirled around, a brilliant smile on his face, his eyes glimmering brightly in the midday light._

_"So are you comin' or what?" He called back, laughing as he turned around again to keep running. Sora scrambled to his feet from the shady spot he'd been sitting in under a palm tree, chasing after his friend. Or would it be his boyfriend? Sora wasn't really all that sure anymore. But, nonetheless, he gave chase, bare feet kicking up sand as he ran, trying hard not to trip like he'd done on more than one occasion._

_"Wait up, Riku! I can't run as fast as you!" He yelled, and quite suddenly Riku skidded to a stop, his body twisting around with a quick, graceful movement. Sora yelped as he tried to stop, and Riku opened both arms and caught him as they fell together into the sand._

_"Riku! Sora! Where'd you two go?" A voice called out over the beach, and the two boys flinched in surprise, exchanging glances of "oh, crap!" as they scrambled to their feet, quickly seperating themselves. Kairi shouldn't know about them. No.. Kairi couldn't know about them. If she did.. well, the boys were more afraid of how depressed she'd get herself rather than what she would do to them. Sure enough, the small redhead came sauntering up to them a few moments later, blinking._

_"Were you two wrestling again or something?" She asked, reaching up and brushing some of the sand out of Sora's spiky hair. Sora snorted and gave his head a shake in an almost dog-like fashion, bits of sand flying from his hair. Riku shielded his face, shooting Sora a look of vague annoyance. Sora shrugged and gave him a sheepish smile back, then turned to Kairi with a big grin._

_"Yeah! And guess what? I won this time!" He said, giving her a thumbs up. Riku gave an irritated twitch beside him, and Sora had to try hard to keep from laughing. Kairi didn't notice, instead she looked up at Riku, a little closer than she had to be._

_"Really?" She asked, her pretty blue eyes wide as she studied him. Riku blinked, stepping back, rubbing the back of his head._

_"Well, y-yeah.." He muttered, wishing she wouldn't try to get so close. She beamed, turning from him and hugging Sora tightly. _

_"You finally beat him, Sora!!" She said, giggling. Sora blinked in surprise, looking over her shoulder at Riku, who sent him a mock-glare. Sora offered another sheepish grin in return, shrugging faintly as he reached up and awkwardly patted the back of Kairi's shoulder. She pulled away from him, practically bouncing on the tips of her toes. _

_"Well, this calls for some sort of party.. I know! I'll go cook up some food, and we'll all have lunch together!" She said, clapping her hands excitedly. "Sound good, Sora? Riku?"_

_The two boys only nodded mechanically. As she dashed off to go start preparing the food, they both fell back onto the sand, laughing._

_"Man, I really wish she wasn't the touchy-feely type." Sora commented, stretching out on the warm ground. Riku gave a small chuckle, doing the same._

_"Sure is a nice day.. wish we didn't have to spend it all with Kairi, hmm?"_

_"Yeah." Sora said, giggling to himself. "Just like old times. Nothin' but the boys, right, Riku?"_

_"Right!" Riku said, grinning over at his friend, rolling over so that he was pinning the other boy to the ground. He smirked down at Sora, leaning down, lips brushing casually over the other's, so calmly that it was apparent that this had happened several times before._

_"So.. when should we tell her?" Sora asked. Riku rolled away, sitting in the sand next to Sora._

_"..we shouldn't." He said, simply. Sora sat up and scowled over at his platinum-haired friend._

_"But we can't just keep it a secret forever! We should tell her, before she finds out on her own!" The younger boy insisted, biting his lip. "Because if she does, she'll be even more hurt than if we just go up and tell her. I know Kairi's like that. She'll get really depressed and stuff, like most girls would."_

_Riku sighed, looking down into the childish, pleading face of his best friend, reaching over and brushing some of the boy's bangs out of his tanned face._

_"I know, I know. We'll tell her, eventually. If the opportunity comes up at this party thing she's planning, we'll try to catch her in a good mood." He reassured Sora, and smiled upon getting a nod from the other boy._

_"Race you there!" He said suddenly, leaping to his feet and taking off. Sora's eyes widened, and before he began to react, Riku had already sprinted a few yards away. Sora scrambled to his feet, a grin breaking out on his face, and dashed after._

~*~

_Heh. We never told her.. didn't want to break her hear_t. Sora thought to himself, smiling a little at the memory. Kairi still didn't know.. and at this rate, probably would never know.. the relationship that had existed, and possibly still did, between the two boys. In fact, no one else knew. Not Selphie, Wakka, Tidus, or even their own parents. Riku had always been adamant about keeping it a secret. He'd always insisted upon keeping the others ignorant of it so that they wouldn't hurt anyone's feelings, especially Kairi's.

"We handle her like porcelain.." Sora murmured thoughtfully, earning a glance from his long-lost friend. That is, his long-lost boyfriend.

"Kairi, I mean." Sora elaborated, grinning sheepishly. "We never told her.. no one ever found out about us, did they?" He asked. Riku shrugged.

"No. And I'd really prefer it stays that way."

"Why?"

"Sora." Riku turned to him, and Sora fidgeted, uncomfortable with the seriousness of the whole situation. Riku frowned a bit. "You know we can't tell anyone about what we had. Kairi will be upset, but the others.. the others might try to fix it."  
  
"What's so bad about that?"

"Sora. Look at me." Riku said sharply. Sora blinked, looking his friend up and down. The blindfold and the jacket made Riku look like some character out of some sci-fi movie or something. "I can't ever take these off. Things can't be the same between us. All of us have had our experiences away from here.. none of us are the same people we used to be. We can't have people being naive and thinking that things can go back to exactly the way they were."

"Why not?" Sora asked, frowning.

"Don't you get it?!" Riku snapped, causing Sora to flinch back in surprise. "We aren't the same people we used to be." His tone held a hint of annoyance in it, which told Sora not to interrupt. "We can't.. we can't have what we used to have." He turned away, slumping back against the trunk of a palm tree. Sora's eyes narrowed a bit.

"I don't see what the problem is. If we try hard enough, things can change.. we can--"   
  
"Don't be such an idiot! Sora, do you even _remember_ what happened?! Can you even see what I am now?!" He stepped back, spreading his arms wide. "Can you look at me now and tell me that we can make things the same again? Can you hold onto those memories you have from when you were the Keybearer and still look at me the same way? I _hurt _you, Sora." Riku turned to his friend, holding his hands out in front of him.

"These hands.. I hurt you with these hands.." He whispered. Sora took a step back, surprised by the quick changes in attitude that Riku went through, doubts beginning to rise in his mind.

_No! No.. I have to believe things can be the same again._ He thought, fists clenching at his sides. _If I don't.. then I might lose Riku forever. I can't have that.. it's unacceptable._

_Things_ have _to be the same again._

~*~To Be Continued...

Sorry for the delay in updating! ^^; Next chappie should come quicker than this one, we hope.

~The Carpet Shampoo and The Ambitious Blank 

Shampoo: I would like to say, the delay in this chapter was all my fault, as I was a slow and lazy editor. ^^ 


	4. Chapter 4

ï»¿ **"Inevitable Disillusion"** **by Shampoo and Blank** **Disclaimer:** Yeah, we all know you wish it was ours... **Authors' Commentary:** Shampoo again, here to write another chapter! Yea! Go me! Whatever...*Squall pose* Blank here.. just to say that multiple personality disorder can be a bad, bad thing. ^_~ Chapter 4: _"Don't you ever just want to leave, Sora...? Don't you ever feel trapped here?" Riku's eyes stared at him, staring at Sora, leaving him feeling vulnerable and exposed. Riku had that effect on people...his eyes were colored such a deep jade; they seemed to see right in you and into the darkest depths of your soul. Sora shrugged, he had never felt compelled to leave the island he called his home. Sora was the island, his skin was so tan like the sand he relaxed on, his personality was bubbly and happy, the epitome of an island paradise, his heart was as big as the ocean that surrounded them, and his eyes shone with such a love for all that was around him, one could only compare it to the sun. If someone had tried to create a person to live on the island in perfect harmony, they could not have created someone better than Sora to be that person. _ _ In every way he was light, from his shining smile to his clear depthless blue eyes. Riku leaned in, his dark eyelashes lowering as he cast his gaze downward. His silver, moonlight locks fell forward, covering his face with a shadow to hide his features. _ _ "Sora? Where are you Sora?" Everything slowly grew darker, like the sun was setting on them. _ _ "I can't see you Sora. Its too bright." _ _ "But Riku, I won't be able to see you if it gets dark!" _ _ "Don't worry Sora. I'll guide you in the dark." Riku glanced up, the blindfold covering those jade eyes. _ _ "R-Riku?" _ _ "Don't you want to leave Sora? Join me in the darkness...We can be together again Sora. We can be joined by the darkness. Its hopeless for us to live in the light anymore..." Riku extended a hand to Sora, as the darkness swelled up in pools around his feet, twisting and turning around his ankles. _ "Riku!" Sora sat up straight in bed and looked around him. The whole room seemed dark and shadowy, and unfamiliar. "Where...where am I?" he wondered, looking around him. He glanced out his window and saw the island out there. "My room...this is my room..." Sora laughed to himself as he reached over and flicked on the light. Someone, probably his mother, had cleaned up the room. He couldn't believe it when he hadn't recognized his own room. Sora tried to remember how he had ended up in his room anyway. Last thing he remembered was feeling sleepy as while he and Riku had sat together, holding hands. It had been nothing special, just the two of them sitting there, holding hands. Nothing like they used to do when they got time alone anyway. Sora smiled softly to himself as he remembered the good old days of him and Riku together. _"Finally! We lost her!" Sora looked over his shoulder one last time to check to make sure Kairi wasn't trailing them. _ _ "Told you we would. My plans never fail." Riku retorted haughtily, smirking in his own way. _ _ "Are you saying MY plans always fail then?" Sora asked, pouting and trying to look upset, but keeping his voice in a soft, flirty tone. Riku thought on this for a moment, then grinned and nodded. Sora growled and tackled him, intent on pinning the boy to the ground, but before he had even made contact with Riku it seemed, he was already pinned underneath him._ _ "See? Your plans always fail..." Riku leaned over and gave Sora a quick, dry peck on the lips. _ _ "If that's what I get for failing, I don't mind..." Sora grinned back, "Sometimes, I wish you and I could just stay like this forever..."_ _ "But then you'd always be the loser on the bottom!" _ Sora smiled softly at the memory, wondering if they'd ever be playful and flirty like that again. When Sora had been with Riku earlier, Riku hadn't teased him at all, and Sora felt uncomfortable and awkward. He didn't know what to say to Riku. A part of him wanted to tackle Riku and kiss him with all the passion and longing he had harbored. Then another part of him just wanted to hold Riku until all his pain was gone. But then there was another part, small it may be, that wanted to leave Riku. To accept that he had changed and that they had changed and abandon Riku. Again. Sora shook off that doubt. He could never abandon his Riku! ...Abandon? Something inside Sora stirred. Kairi had been back three years now, along with Selphie, Tidus, Wakka and the other islanders. Riku had been back for two years now. For a year Kairi had probably said Sora would be back with Riku. And then Sora wasn't. "What am I doing asleep!? I gotta go say hi to people!" Sora felt guilty for not immediately running to see his mother. She was probably off thinking Sora was dead and here he was, sound asleep in his own bed. Riku had probably snuck him in, it was pretty late and Sora didn't feel like he'd been asleep long. So that means... "Mom doesn't even know I'm home yet!" Sora tiptoed down the hall and opened his mother's door slightly. She was asleep. "Mom..." he whispered softly as he stepped all the way in. "Mom, wake up..." Sora called, a little louder this time. His mother stirred and Sora saw her open one sleepy eye, a sparkling cerulean like his own. "Mom, it's me, Sora." That was the magic words. Sora suddenly found himself caught up in his mother's arms, a position that had embarrassed him his whole life, but now...Sora realized that in his whole journey, he had been so caught up in Riku and Kairi, he hadn't even thought too much of his mother. But now, being back here with her... "Mom, mommy...sorry I didn't come home right away...I ran into Kairi and Riku..." Sora's mom fell down on her knees and stared her little boy straight in the face. "Sora, sweetie, its ok...Don't cry sweetie, you're home now...Everyone's home now. Sora, why are you crying?" Sora reached one hand up to his face and felt where it was damp. He hadn't even realized he'd been crying. "I'm just glad to be home...Everything's back to normal now, except for..." Sora's eyes looked downwards and his thoughts drifted to Riku. "Riku, right?" She asked. Sora blinked in surprise. His mother had always been really good at reading his mind. "I'd figured you'd already met up with him..." She reached up and wiped away the tears, as Sora nodded at her words. "He's changed, Sora...you need to take care of him now." She said, smiling softly at him. Sora had never actually told his mother about Riku and his relationship, but she always dropped hints that she knew, and he in turn, dropped hints that she was right. It was a childish game they played, but it could always bring a bright smile to Sora's face. Sora managed a small smile of his own, and nodded at his mother, softly breathing in a scent like light cinnamon, a comforting scent to tell him he was home again. "Riku's done nothing but ask for you." His mother continued. "Kairi's been taking care of him, but you can see he didn't like that too much. He hasn't spoken once to her, nor to anyone for that matter. I've cooked for him several times, but he tends to have no appetite. Though Sora, in your eyes, I guess he's always going to be the Riku whom you'll look up to..." She sighed faintly, but kept her smile. Sora listened intently, his eyes wide, almost with disbelief. "Riku's never eaten a lot, Mom...you're just used to kids with my appetite..." Sora said, trying to convince himself to believe the lie that had just slipped through his lips. Sora's mother had practically raised Riku as well, the two were seemingly never apart, and she knew very well that Riku could easily eat just as much as Sora. "All the same, Sora...watch out for him?" His mother asked. Sora nodded, though in his mind he waved it off as mere nonsense. _Riku doesn't need ME to take care of him...he's perfectly fine on his own...I know he is...He has to be!_ __ ~*~To Be Continued... Sorry for the delay! ^^ 


	5. Chapter 5

Inevitable Disillusion

Co-Written by The Carpet Shampoo and The Ambitious Blank

Disclaimer- Kingdom Hearts isn't ours. If it was, well.. hrm.. let us plot for a few minutes, and we'll get back to you. ^_^ But it's still not ours.

Comments- Fwee, Blank here, with the next chappie. Lyrics are from Nickelback's "Someday".

~*~

How the hell did we wind up like this?  
Why weren't we able  
To see the signs that we missed,  
And try to turn the tables?  
  
I wish you'd unclench your fists,  
And unpack your suitcase.  
Lately there's been too much of this,  
Don't think its too late...

~*~

Sora woke up to another day in his own bed, something he had yet to be accustomed to. Sure, the beds in Traverse Town and wherever else he'd stayed hadn't been all that uncomfortable, but there was nothing compared to the feeling of someone's own bed. He stretched his arms high over his head, carefully easing his stiff muscles into the new day. 

"Ahh.." He yawned and reached over, grasping the edge of his dark blue curtains and pulling them open, the bright sunlight streaming through in a golden flash that nearly blinded Sora's pretty blue eyes. He jerked in surprise as there was an agonized groan from the floor.

"Ugghhh.." The figure on the floor looked like a shadow, a striking contrast against brilliant sunlight that was now streaming into the room. The figure rolled over and moaned piteously. Sora blinked, his groggy mind slowing comprehending all this.

_OH! Riku, I completely forgot!_ Grinning sheepishly to himself, he shut the curtains again and Riku fell still again. The silver-haired boy had been spending the past few days at his house, with full permission from Sora's mother, as she decided the two boys needed to talk, and so that Sora could take care of Riku. It had become almost routine by now. Sora would wake up everyday, surprised at finding his own room surrounding him, and he would open the curtains, be reminded of the second presence in his room, and immediately close them again. 

"Sorry, Riku. I guess this takes some getting used to, huh..?" He asked, scratching the back of his head. Riku had been sleeping on a futon on his floor for the nights he'd been staying over.

"You said that yesterday, too." Riku grumbled, rolling over. Another part of the routine. Riku would roll over, and Sora, without fail, would always be surprised at the lack of those piercing yet playful aqua eyes, replaced by the ugly fabric of that blindfold. Sora missed those bright eyes.. how everyone else would look away from that sharp gaze, and how he was the only one who dared keep full eye contact with his friend. But compared to that bright, swirling gaze that Riku had, the blindfold was ugly. Something that didn't belong, something completely unworthy of being there in the first place. Sora sighed and shrugged.

"Sorry." He apologized again, grinning. Riku's eyeroll was practically audible in the silence that followed. Sora sighed, throwing on some clothes he found lying on his floor. 

"Come on, we'll go grab something to eat." He said cheerfully. Riku rose from the bed without another word and trailed after him slowly, with a delibrate sort of pace. Sora trotted down the stairs, knowing Riku had memorized his house by now, and into the kitchen. His mother greeted the two boys cheerfully.

"Good morning, Sora, Riku!" She said brightly, beaming at them. "Hope you don't mind some cereal and muffins.. I'll make you guys a big lunch and dinner to make up for iSora remembered a time when he was little, when he'd asked his mother if she was the sun, because her smile was so bright. His mother had laughed loudly, and had been even more cheery the rest of the week. 

Riku, on the other hand, reminded him of the moon. Sora eyed his friend over his bowl of cereal, watching him eat slowly. Riku's pale face was like that of the moon, his platinum-colored hair, seemingly wound of gossamer strands of moonlight, reminded him of the bright, silvery beams of light that would stream between the cracks in his curtains at night, illuminating his room almost as brightly at the sun. Even now, with his seafoam green eyes hidden beneath the band of leathery fabric, his face was like that of the moon, strikingly beautiful against the dark black of his clothing. Sora smiled to himself. 

_Well, isn't this sappy.. he's turning me into a poet_. The boy laughed to himself softly, earning a look of questioning from his friend. Sora shook his head.

"Don't ask." He said, smirking a bit. Riku stared at him for another moment, before silently returning to his food, which he seemed less than interested in. Sora frowned slightly, but decided not to nag his friend about it today. He was sure Riku had gotten enough of it from Kairi. The thought made him smile again as he stood up and went to clean their bowls out.

~*~

Eventually, Sora and Riku left the house, heading out to Sora's boat. Sora rowed them over to the island where they'd all left on their big adventure. Selphie, Tidus, Wakka, and Kairi were all there, playing around as usual. Sora watched them for a minute after helping Riku out of the boat, clambering up onto the dock. The three younger kids said their cheerful hellos to Riku, and he waved a hand at them in return. Sora didn't miss the strange lights they had in their eyes.. he knew what they were thinking, what they had probably started thinking a long time ago.

Things aren't the same.

Those haunting words echoed again and again in Sora's ears, and he struggled to shut it out. Luckily, Kairi provided a distraction, running over and enveloping Sora into a tight hug. She pulled away with a smile.

"Hey, Sora." She said, casually. Sora blinked then gave a small laugh.

"Hey, Kairi." He returned, grinning. Riku watched them in the silence he seemed to have sworn himself into. Sora frowned over at him, and Kairi's gaze followed him. Riku's mouth twitched slightly, Sora knew that he knew very well that they were watching him. Sora turned back and gave a slight shrug at Kairi. She didn't need to say anything, her face expressed the same wish that his mother had for him a few days ago. 

Take care of Riku.

Sora had no objections. Riku meant the world to him. Without him, he'd been missing what felt like a complete half of himself. Kairi and the others, of course, also held a special place in Sora's heart, but Riku always had the biggest piece to himself. 

_Heh. Just like always, right, Riku..?_ Sora thought, smiling faintly as he turned to go with his friend. Riku watched them, a small smirk quirking at his lips.

"Y'know, I might not be able to see, but I can hear.. so if you two are trying to plot against me over there, it's not going to work." He teased, crossing his arms. Sora's grin widened. He treasured the moments when Riku would tease them like that, because it gave him that small bit of flickering hope that maybe things really could end up the way they used to be, after all.

~*~

The two boys wandered along the shoreline. Sora was barefoot, letting the ocean wash over his feet, while Riku wandered farther up, within the shadows of the palm trees. Sora watched him for a minute. It was so strange. Riku was so familiar to him, and yet this dark figure on the beach seemed so out of place. He scowled slightly, then decided to voice his concern.

"Um, Riku..? Do you think you'll ever be able to take off that blindfold and stuff..?" He asked. Riku's head snapped to him, and Sora could almost feel the glare through he blindfold.

"Are you still stuck on that?" Riku asked sharply. Sora stopped walking, staring at the ground.

"It's just.. you can't stay like that forever, can you? I mean.. you weren't in darkness for that long." He said, hesitantly, his gaze slowly travelling back up to Riku again. Riku had lowered his head in thought.

"I don't know, Sora. I gave into the darkness in my heart.. and this is the price I pay." He spread his arms out, and Sora looked his friend over for what seemed like the thousandth time. He wanted so desperately to see those bright, sparkling blue-green eyes. To see the familiar bright colors of Riku's clothes. To see Riku smile.. honestly smile. It would mean the world to him if he could see that again. Yet, it seemed so virtually impossible, with this.. this thing standing in front of him now.

A fist clenched in determination. He had to try and help Riku, like he promised. He had to try to get things back to normal. Back to the way they were. Before everything had happened.

They kept walking in silence, while Sora thought over what he had to work with, and what he had to do.

_Well, we have to find some way to try and get Riku able to tolerate light.. and that way, we can at least get him looking normal again. And.. and maybe, if he's able to move around like he used to, maybe he'll start acting normal too! _

Sora nodded to himself, looking up to the figure in the shadows. Riku noticed Sora's gaze on him, and turned toward him, one slender brow raising upward curiously.

But.. I don't know if we can do anything but wait for that. So.. I guess I'll just have to treat him like he's normal until he thinks he can stand the light.

"Hey, Riku!" He said, running up to him. "Remember the Secret Place? Let's go back there! I wanna see if it's changed any, and if all our drawings are still there!" He said, grabbing his friend by the arm and leading him. Riku gave a few squeaks of protest as he was led through brief spots of sunlight, until they paused before the cave. 

"Let's go!" Sora said. Riku hesitated. He'd memorized most of the island already with Sora's help, but they hadn't been back to this place yet.   
  
"Sora.. I can't see.." He said, quietly. Sora smiled a bit. He knew how hard it was for Riku to admit to his weaknesses like this. Sora's hands grasped Riku's, and he pulled him gently.

"Don't worry, I'll guide you.." Sora said comfortingly, giving a careful tug. "Duck down a little.. we aren't as short as we used to be." He laughed softly and then turned, one hand still grasping his friend's as they entered the old cave. Riku seemed to relax slightly as they entered it. It was pretty dark and shadowy in there. Finally, they reached the room where all their drawings were. Tiny dots of light filtered through the ceiling, and Sora looked around him. Riku frowned slightly.

"..is everything still here..?" He asked. Sora nodded.

"Yeah. All our drawings and everything."

"What about that one you drew a while ago when Kairi first came here? You know, that one where the dragon's attacking.. and you're protecting Kairi while I jump in to fight..?" He asked. "I think it was near the ceiling.. you almost fell when you finished drawing that." [1]

Sora knew which one he was talking about. His eyes flickered up to the familiar drawing near the ceiling.

~*~

_"There, I'm done!" The young Sora announced as he finished up his drawing and stood back proudly to admire it, remembering too late that there wasn't any place to step back to, except what seemed like a very long fall. Riku made a small noise of surprise and dashed forward, seeing Sora's mistake._

_The young boy toppled downward several feet, and Riku caught him. Or, at least, tried to catch him, only to be dragged down with him. The two boys ended up as a pile of arms and legs on the ground. Sora scowled, investigating a bruise on his knee as his racing heart began to slow. Riku snorted at him incredulously._

_"What, you're not gonna cry or nothin'..?" He asked. Sora blinked, then grinned._

_"Nope! You told me not to cry anymore, Riku, so.. I won't!" He chirped, smiling. "'sides, if you're here, you'll protect me, right?"   
  
Riku thought over this for a few moments, then grinned._

_"Right." He said. Sora smiled._

_"And.. in case you're ever in trouble, I'll do my best to protect you, too." He said, grinning. Riku smiled up at him, then frowned again._

_"Well, that's great.. I have something you can do for me right now, as a matter of fact."_

_"What's that?" Sora's big blue eyes blinked down at Riku's face._

_"Get off me!"_

~*~

Sora was snapped out of his reverie by a pair of strong arms sliding around his waist, pulling him close. His heart thudded violently against his ribcage.

"Riku..?" He asked hesitantly. Riku didn't say anything, just held him there. Sora bit his lip, tilting his head back a little to look up at the silver-haired boy. Riku still did not offer any words, but his grip tightened a little around Sora. Sora turned himself around in Riku's arms and laid his head against Riku's chest, letting himself be held for a long time. Sora tilted his head up and captured Riku's lips in a warm kiss. 

This…this is what I've been missing… 

Sora fell into a torrent of his own thoughts, swirling around his head as Riku's lips softly pressed against his. Riku's lips were cold against his own, like the ocean at midnight softly caressing against the warm sandy lips that Sora had. It was a moment frozen in time, an ancient legend that had been forgotten, the tale of two star-crossed lovers who met after years of not seeing each other. In Sora's mind, the kiss made he and Riku into a fairy tale, but one where there was no princess or peaceful kingdom. There was only a noble prince, and his fair cool-headed knight, sworn to guard him always. The dragon was defeated and the world was safe again. Sora was safe again. 

            _Never again…things can never change between us again…_

Riku broke away from the kiss, his expression hidden by the shadows, but Sora knew he had to be smiling. Riku always smiled after they kissed. Everything was still the same. Everything had to be the same. He imagined Riku's smile as the silver haired boy faded off into the darkness, slipping into the shadows that surrounded them.

            Riku couldn't stay there anymore. He slipped out of Sora's sight and watched the brown haired boy…after all these years, Sora was still a boy to Riku, he watched him slip away into his world of light. 

            _How even through this blindfold can I see more clearly than you Sora…? _

Riku sighed and put his hand up against his forehead, the end of his palm was just able to feel the area growing damp from where his tears stained the fabric. The world was so clear to him, to Riku. He could see now the only way, the only path to make Sora see how different things were.

~*~

How the hell did we wind up like this?  
Why weren't we able  
To see the signs that we missed,  
And try to turn the tables?  
Now the story's played out like this,  
Just like a paperback novel.  
Lets rewrite an ending that fits,  
Instead of a hollywood horror.  
  
Nothin's wrong,  
Just as long as  
You know that someday I will...  
  
Someday, somehow,  
Gonna make it alright, but not right now.  
I know you're wondering when.  
(You're the only one who knows that.)  
Someday, somehow,  
Gonna make it alright, but not right now.  
I know you're wondering when.  
(You're the only one who knows that.)  
I know you're wondering when.  
(You're the only one who knows that.)  
I know you're wondering when...

~*~To Be Continued..

Author's Commentary: Shampoo here. Once again I am completely and totally responsible for the lateness of this chapter. ^^


	6. Chapter 6

ï»¿   
**"Inevitable Disillusion"  
By The Carpet Shampoo and The Ambitious Blank**   
  
**Disclaimer-** Kingdom Hearts still isn't ours. ^^;   
**Comments-** Blank here, with the last chappie. ;_; Written by Shampoo, edited by me. Hope you all have some tissues handy. ^^   
  
  
**Chapter 6**  
  
The sun sank slowly over the horizon, drooping down slowly, as if it knew the night would bring something bad, and it wanted to fight off the inevitable darkness that was to come. The sun tried desperately to keep sending off its light, turning the sky a blood red color, as slowly it fell, dying at the hand of the night.  
Riku stared out, standing back in the welcoming shadows, staring out in the direction of the sun, as if he could see it sinking below the darkness. He didn't care what the night brought. He had been waiting for this moment now, it seemed, for such a long time.  
At last the sun took its final breath, and fell beneath the surface, and Riku stepped out his door. He took a deep breath, inhaling the deep scent of the night air. After all, it was his domain. To someone who didn't know the silver haired boy, the site would have been strange. A long dark cape, a silver haired beauty, who only came out at night. Children who saw him would whisper in hushed voices, "Vampire...", mothers would lock their windows, fathers would look worried and pull their children back indoors. Sadly, this was the way the world treated Riku.   
In some way, Riku could tell that perhaps if he had foreseen this happening to himself, he could have prevented it, somehow. That maybe he and Sora could truly have been together forever. But no, he'd made this choice on his own, and was now forced to face the fearful eyes of the people he once knew. The world would forever treat him this way.  
But not Sora. Sora remembered Riku as the Greek-esque, shining god, the one who stood above the crowd on an alabaster pedestal, shining down on them from above, pushing everyone, especially pushing Sora, to be a better person. Riku had been the god of the island, everyone worshipped him, whether they admitted it or not.   
But Sora... Sora had loved him more than anyone else ever had.  
"That's why..." Riku whispered. Inside now, he wasn't so confident anymore. He knew that Sora loved him, and that he loved Sora. But he couldn't lie to Sora. He couldn't live with himself, if Sora could not love who he had become. It had been too long, Riku had spent too long away from his home.   
The island was a paradise to them; it was heaven, and he and Sora lived Like angels, loving each other the way boys did. They were shy at first, not quite sure of themselves and each other, but gradually they grew comfortable with each other, and held hands while dreaming of forever paradise with each other.  
But then the darkness came. Riku stepped into the darkness and planned on giving up heaven and an angel forever. His heart was Sora's, as he stepped into the gateway to hell; now Riku, the fallen angel. The forbidden lover of so many fairy tales, the one in the shadows who only appeared out at night.  
In the darkness, Riku learned what hell really was. Hell was betraying those people you loved, Hell for Riku was betraying Sora, it was being away from Sora, it was everything he did to the boy he loved.  
_Hell is what I deserve now...an angel cannot love a demon, Sora, unless he's willing to become one himself. I can't betray you again; I love you too much. You still live in a world of light, a world where we both live in heaven, and we both shine in white light and bliss. This is my fault, Sora. So, I'm giong to do everything I can to make things right again. I love you...  
_  
Sora looked around impatiently, shivering slightly in the cold. He knew Riku was coming; Riku always came for him. Sora glanced around and trembled in the shadows. He wasn't just shaking because of the cold; it was a little scary being out at night too. Sora knew it was a silly thing to be laughing at, but it was true. Sometimes he was scared of the dark. But once Riku was here, everything would be okay. Riku was like a light, Riku could light up the world with just his smile, he was like a shining god to Sora, standing on a marble stand for all the world to see, and for Sora alone to love.   
"Sora..." Sora turned and broke into a smile. Already the world seemed   
brighter as he saw his best friend and first love standing there before him.  
Riku reached out to his friend and pulled him in close, holding the younger   
boy against him.  
"Please...Sora, forgive me...and let me love you just one more time..." Sora   
looked up, confusion written all over his face. He had never been good at   
hiding his emotions.  
"Don't try and understand." Riku said firmly. Sora nodded his head, and wrapped his skinny arms around Riku's waist.  
A breeze blew and Sora shivered, cuddling up closer to Riku, for what little good it did. Riku seemed colder now, his pale skin, which Sora had always found surprisingly warm for something that looked so cold and icy, was now as cold as it looked. Riku tilted his head down, moonlight silver locks brushing against and tickling Sora's forehead, before Riku planted an icy kiss on Sora's forehead.  
"You're cold..." whispered Sora.  
"I'm sorry..." Riku apologized, a pang striking his heart. Everytime Sora commented on one thing that had changed, even if it was the smallest thing, it hurt him. He knew he couldn't go on living like this, struggling to be the actor in the play of Sora's innocence, trying to make things normal again even if he knew it was futile.   
It's hard being an actor when you know the play will never turn out right.  
"Its okay..." Sora reassured him, just like always.   
Riku knew it would never be okay.  
  
  
The two of them walked alongside the beach, gazing out at the dark water that gently lapped against the cool sand beneath their feet. Sora stared out at the ocean. The ocean, by night, remained such a beautiful sight to Sora, no matter how many nights he saw it. The moon seemed to swing low, a huge silver orb in the sky, lighting up the world for all the nightwalkers and late-night lovers. The ocean stretched out like a giant beautiful mirror for the gods, reflecting the moon back up on itself. The water rippled, distorting the moons reflection slightly, but rather than creating a chaotic ugly image of distortion, the moon light skipped from wave to wave, cresting each wave with a light platinum and sparkle, a graceful recovery from impending disaster.   
"Do you think the moon gets lonely up there all by itself?" Sora asked, his blue eyes sparkling with the platinum of the waves as the moonlight caught them.  
"Its got all the stars to keep its company, doesn't it?" Riku asked, amused by the young boy's question. Sora's naivety had always fascinated him in strange ways he couldn't quite explain.  
"Yeah, but...sometimes little stars aren't enough company, you need someone who understands you in life, I think..." Sora said. Riku gazed up at the moon himself.  
"I don't think the moon gets lonely...maybe it has no one to keep it company, but it takes care of the stars, and watches over and guides the earth. Besides, the sun isn't lonely, is it?"   
"No...the sun is so bright, I think it knows how to keep itself happy..." Sora replied.  
"Have faith in the moon, Sora. It won't be lonely."  
"If you say so, Riku..." Sora answered airily. Riku turned the boy towards him, gently rotating him around, an action to which the brunette easily complied. Riku leaned in and pressed his lips to Sora's. Memories of being two boys shy of kissing came flooding back to Sora for a moment, but thoughts of being with Riku calmed his suddenly jumpy nervous as he responded to the kiss, moving his lips against Riku's to deepen it. Sora pushed up against Riku, and the two of them stumbled down into the sand, Sora falling right into Riku's arms. If they broke contact, they didn't know it, as they toppled down into the sand, holding each other tightly.  
The old worries of their fairy tale-like forbidden love seem to have been forgotten, tossed carelessly like the waves nearby. There were no more worries of "being caught" or scaring each other. The two merged together, tumbling own into the sand, their lips locked together in a kiss. They lay side by side, Riku's strong pale arms holding Sora around the waist, Sora's skinny tan arms linked around behind Riku's neck.   
They lay there for a long time, kissing occasionally, cuddling with each other, playing with each other's hair, fingers, toes. Riku planted gentle, playful kisses along Sora's neckline. Sora buried his hands in platinum hair, letting his legs get tangled up with the other boys. But most of all, they enjoyed each other's company. Sora eventually fell asleep easily, curled up like a child in Riku's arms, the peaceful moon keeping watch over its two angels, bathing them in a pale white light.  
  
  
Sora woke up first the next day. It was just before sunrise and he gentle shook Riku's shoulders, and planted soft kisses on the boys forehead.  
"Riku, wake up. Its almost sunrise." Riku sat up and to Sora's surprise, immediately placed the blue eyed boy in a tight embrace.  
"Sora, I have to do this..." Riku said, whispering softly into the other boy's ear. He kissed Sora's earlobe and pulled away. Sora blinked his bright blue eyes, surprised by how dead serious Riku's tone was. Riku backed off until he was seated on his knees. The rising sun created a golden silhouette around him as the boy reached back and began to untie the blindfold.  
"I can't handle the light, Sora...it hurts so bad."  
"Riku, stop it! Go inside!" Sora reached out for the boy, but Riku gestured for him to stop. Sora withdrew, too confused and surprised to do anything.  
"Sora, its time now. Things aren't going to be the same, you'll see in a minute." Riku let the blindfold fall, keeping his eyes shut as he slipped the black robes over his head. Underneath he was wearing his old clothes, a sight that sickened Sora in a way. As the light hit Riku's skin, the boy frowned, biting his lip in a twisted expression of pain. He grabbed at his arms, in one last, desperate attempt at trying to stop the sun before he fell into the sand.  
"Riku!" Sora's legs worked at last as he dove towards the boy. "Riku, please..." The pale boy lay there, twitching in pain, even as Sora held him, and tried to block out the light with his body.  
"I chose this....Sora..." Riku's voice sounded through clenched teeth. His eyes remained tightly closed as he reached and grabbed Sora's wrist tightly.  
"Sora..." Riku gasped, drawing in air suddenly, before he opened his eyes and stared up at the other boy. Sora gasped at the sight. The eyes still shimmered the royal jade they had always been, that weird mysterious glow that always seemed to shine from Riku's eyes was still there, but beyond that, Sora saw such pain, the pain of knowing you betrayed the one you love, the pain of knowing that you could never be with the one you loved.  
"Oh Riku...I didn't know, I didn't know..." Riku smiled at Sora, before shutting his eyes again.  
"I know...Sora....But...it's okay now...I'll be fine...I love you so much Sora. I'm sorry...that it came...to this..." Riku relaxed in Sora's arms, letting the brunette boy hold him. Sora clutched Riku to him and put his ear up to the older boy's chest. It was so quiet... even the seagulls had stopped calling to each other, only the stubborn waves persisted, lapping at the sand.  
"Riku...? Riku, wake up, Riku..."  
_ No...It can't be...people just don't die from sunlight._  
"Riku, come on. This isn't funny..."  
_But his body...it's been in darkness for so long..._  
"Riku I mean it, get up!"  
_He couldn't handle the darkness...and its all my fault for not noticing!_  
"Riku...?" Sora felt tears spill over his cheeks, he watched them fall onto Riku's lifeless body, but he couldn't explain why he was crying just yet.   
_All I wanted was for things to be the same again._  
"Riku, please, Riku, I love you too, please wake up!" Sora gasped for air, something in his chest was clamping down on his lungs, and Sora found that it was growing harder by the minute to breathe.   
_Was I really that blind...?_  
"Riku, God, Riku, wake up!" The tears flowed freely now, and Sora didn't bother to wipe them away. Within his chest, he felt this pain. Sora had been sad before, but never anything like this. It was an actual physical pain, like there was a knife within his body, tearing away at his heart, shattering his very soul into pieces.   
_Just don't leave me alone..._   
"Riku...I love you Riku, I need you, I need you so much..." Sora fell down and lay crying on Riku's chest, the pain where his heart was made it hard to breathe, and he couldn't quite stand up. The world was spinning around him, his nerves were shaking out of control, but this time there was no Riku to calm his trembling, to wipe away his tears. There would never be another Riku. Sora managed a strangled cry before he passed out from the pain.  
_ I love you so much, Riku...I forgive you...do you forgive me, for not   
seeing that things have changed? I see the changes now, Riku. I love you so   
much..._  
  
  
Weeks passed, a funeral for Riku was held, though memories of it were fuzzy in Sora's mind. Sora drifted about as if he were dead too, that constant ache remained in his heart, as if Riku has died and taken Sora's heart with him, and that ache Sora felt was the empty hole where a heart belonged.   
_He did this because he loved you, Sora..._ Kairi's words echoed back in his   
mind, but Sora didn't see how they made sense as he stared out at the   
setting sun.   
There had been anger. Sure, there had been anger, sadness, confusion, and a period of complete apathy where nothing had seemed to matter anymore. Kairi and the others had done their best to try and keep him in good spirits, something for which he was grateful, but he knew that no one could replace what he'd had.  
"I changed my mind, Riku. The sun is very lonely, no matter how bright it is. And no matter how many people it has to watch over, the moon is lonely, too..." Sora glanced up and noticed something he was quite sure he hadn't seen before. The moon had already risen and was sharing the sky with the sun. The sun was sinking slowly, holding on as it passed the rising moon. Sora felt sad in a way, he knew the sun and moon would soon be alone, but the fact that they had this brief moment together took a weight off Sora's heart momentarily. There was still healing to be done, there would always be healing that was needed.   
_Isn't that right, Riku? The sun's naive...it doesn't understand that it really needs the moon to keep balance in the world. But I think today, it might finally be beginning to understand. Precious moments may not last forever... but in our hearts and minds, we know there's another to always be looking forward to._  
Sora had given his whole heart to Riku, but Riku had given his heart to Sora. They both ended up with a full heart in the end. The ache was still there in Sora's heart, and his eyes still filled with tears when he thought of Riku.  
But the sun and the moon where briefly united again, even if only for a short amount of time, and Sora knew he might have to wait a long while, but someday, he and Riku would meet again at sunset.   
  
**Fin.**   
****   



End file.
